1. You need to treat yourself first. Go to Al-anon and to an addictions counselor and get support. Alcoholism is an illness that you can't conquer on your own. You need help. You have probably been helping the alcoholic or addict drink or use drugs by covering up for them--this has got to stop. Once you get support, then you can act.
2. Hire an addictions professional to help you carry out an intervention. Don't try and do this yourself, it's too complicated and risky.
3. With the counselor's help, gather together an intervention team. This is a group of people who have been adversely affected by the person's drinking or drug use (family, friends, employer, coworkers, clergy, doctor, etc.) Talk about the problem and how it has adversely affected you. Agree that the drinking is a serious problem and treatment is necessary. Gather people who are willing and able to intervene. Remember, this will save the alcoholic's life. Don't choose people who are weak or who have an alcohol problem. Chose people who are strong enough to tell the alcoholic the truth.
4. Have each person write the alcoholic a letter detailing exact situations where the alcoholic's drinking hurt them. Then state that they want the alcoholic to go to treatment and then list what they are going to do if the alcoholic refuses. They could say they are not going to protect the alcoholic from the consequences of their drinking anymore. The employer may discharge the alcoholic, the spouse may move out, the children may not let the alcoholic be alone with the grandchildren, etc. These consequences need to be specific and the person willing to carry though.
5. Choose a good treatment center and make sure they have a bed open.
6. Practice the intervention with one of the members of the intervention team playing the patient. Make sure that the professional runs the meeting and everyone tries to be gentle and loving. Expect the alcoholic to be defensive, that's how the illness works. Everyone tells the alcoholic how much they care and why they want him or her to go to treatment.
7. Pack the patients bag and have transportation to the treatment center ready.
8. Pick a time when the alcoholic will be sober, usually in the morning, and take them to a neutral facility so you can meet privately. Don't use the alcoholic's home.
9. Carry out the intervention being honest and loving.
10. The intervention is over when the person agrees to go to treatment or the professional believes that the meeting has served its purpose. Most interventions take about an hour and ends in the person going to treatment, but sometimes the best you can do is plant the seeds of the truth that hopefully will grow later. No intervention is wasted if the truth comes out.
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